I’m A Whiner

Yep, a whiner. Not a winner today. This head cold had me coughing, sneezing and my ears were stopped up. Nice.

Wonder just how impressive I can look at work with a tissue stuck up my nose?

The Dayquil wasn’t cutting it so I scored some off brand Theraflu (Theraflu has been pulled from the shelves?).

I crawl into bed only to have my nose totally stop up, and I can hear my heartbeat in my ears. So, I prop up all my pillows and my body pillow so I can sleep upright. Funny how that doesn’t work. I fall asleep and end up laying flat on the bed again.

I resolve myself to the fact that I’m going to have to go back to sleep listening to the wonderful sounds of my heart beat and just sleep with my mouth open so I can breathe.

I remembered reading about putting Vicks vapor rub and socks on your feet to help ease a cough and congestion. I also remembered something about cooking an onion, wrapping it in a cloth and putting it on your chest.  I opted for the Vicks.

However, since I didn’t have any Vicks I thought of every product that I have in the apartment that has menthol in it. I ended up slathering the soles of my feet with Tiger Balm and throwing some socks on.

Doesn’t work quite like I had hoped but it did help. Since I still couldn’t breathe through my nose and hate the dry throat that comes with sleeping with your mouth open I popped a throat lozenge in my mouth (yes, I even thought about putting a lozenge in each sock – hey, they have menthol in them!) and slept on my stomach because I was afraid of choking on it in my sleep.

The sneezing calmed down a lot and so had the coughing – as long as I laid on my stomach and breathed through my mouth. Then my nose starts running. I only have two pillows which gives me a total of four ‘clean’ sides to work with…so I just stuff a Kleenex up my nose.

At this point I didn’t care. It seemed like the perfect solution since my nose and lips are already so red, sore and peeling from all the nose blowing I’ve done over the past few days.

Today I feel better. I can breathe through my nose. I am not sneezing or coughing.

I do have the the red nose and dry lips thing going on, and my face is swollen from sleeping on it last night.

Guess I’ll be throwing a layer of hemorrhoid cream on my face just to get the swelling down so I don’t look totally awesome awful  at work today. Make jokes if you want about me treating my face like a butt with hemorrhoids, but it really works! Not to mention that my face is being a butt today…